Do you love me enough....?

Today, I had a great shower thought. Most of you may think this is really strange, but I actually get my BEST thoughts in the shower! So don't be surprised if you read later on and I'm referring to a "shower thought" I've had recently.

So last blog I mentioned how one of my biggest fears was loving someone so much and not have them love me back. I also said that God's been working with me on this. And, I believe my shower thought gave me the "lightbulb" (despicable me voice) to get over that fear that I've had since high school.

For some reason, while in the shower, I had the song by Switchfoot, "Enough to Let Me Go" stuck in my head. I was thinking about this song for another reason but then realized that this song totally applies to me!

In my head, I was wondering if this song was about Jon and a girl, Jon and God, or God talking to Jon...honestly, I think it can go either way. But in my instance, I believe God is speaking those words to me:

Do you love me enough to let me go?
Do you love me enough to let me go?
To let me follow through, let me fall for you, my love
Do you love me enough to let me go?


After pondering these words some more, it made me think of Abraham and Isaac. In Genesis 22, Abraham is told by God to use Isaac as a burnt offering, AFTER God previously promised Abraham he would have a son at his old age. Just by this part of the story alone, I can see how people can think the God of the Old Testament is a harsh, cold, jealous God because "what kind of god would make Abraham offer up his only son to be a burnt offering after he promised he would be the father of many nations?" Well, my friends, the people that asked that question didn't read far enough. God PROVIDED the animal needed to be sacrificed so that Abraham didn't have to kill his own son. It was a test to show how far Abraham would go to please his Father.


Now, Abraham loved God enough to let his own son, his own flesh and blood go for the sake of God the Father. If Abraham is willing to do THAT....why aren't we willing to give up our fears? Our pride? Our doubts and worries? Our plans? Our choices and decisions?


I love that God is patient with us and loves us even though we tend to do our own thing. He sits back and waits for us but gives us just what we need to come back to Him. If it's a testament of my love for God and for what He's done for me, I guess I can let go of myself, my doubts, worries, fears, and picture in my head of what my future husband will be like. You know why? I love Him enough to let Him follow through and have whoever he is fall for me. I just have to let go of myself.